When its up and running I'll let you know. I promise. Thank you. I love you.
Eyup! That's Yorkshirian. If Yorkshirian is even a word, which it probably isn't. But chuffing hekk; this is Yorkshire and if there is one thing they do well, its random words. Actually there are so many things Yorkshire does well. Here is a short and completely incomplete list; puddings, generosity, scenery, humour, realism. So why am I rambling about Yorkshire? Because I live here... Until tomorrow. You see, tomorrow is the day I leave my beloved Yorkshire cottage and I'm feeling quite chuffing sad about it. Over the past 10 months living here, I have experienced said amazing things, but also some real not fun stuff that I will not bore you or traumatise myself further with right now. Anyway, you're reading this post about here and now, so I can hear you telling (okay, shouting) at me to get to the point. Haha, jokes on you, I never have a point, or when I do, I make you chuffing work for it (lets see how many times and different contexts I can use chuff in during this post). The first why; not why I'm sad (do I need to list some more), but why I'm leaving. I quit my job and am moving back to Autstralia... soon, I think. I left work in April and since then have travelled through Italy, Switzerland and France with my brother and sister-in-law, before having a week in the Netherlands with friends. Now I'm here (I promise I will tell you where here is shortly) on the verge of tears, thinking about all that is to shortly come (I'm talking Spain, Greece and the UK with my parents before home to Aus). But why?! I don't know. I love this place. Its rough and unconventional and people always say "Why did you go to Barnsley?!" in this awful chuffing tone, but I love it! It has become home. So if this is home, what is Aus? The thing is that I don't feel complete here, but after falling in love with my Yorkshire community, how will I be whole once I return to Australia? Rolling out those rhetorical questions like no ones business. These are the things that float through my mind when I'm not reading in case you were wondering. Here is where I arrive at the point. 'Here', is the Barnsley library and 'why'? Why choose to come to a public place (on the verge of tears remember) and be mildly aware that the library staff are reading this over my shoulder (hello good sir) when I could be at home sobbing like a mad woman and hoeing into a vegan biscuit (that is a whole other blog post)? Truth be told that I've been asking myself that for the last week. When I got back from the Netherlands, all I did was yearn to write, but a day turned into a week and I just didn't. I think the biggest thing deterring me honestly, isn't something deep and subconsciously driven, but rather that my laptop is slow and my patience when it comes to technology is limited. I didn't plan to write this now. I just came to return my books and print my Tesco vouchers (see how local I am) but when I logged onto the desktop and felt my fingers floating fluently across the keyboard using touch type, I was as good as chuffed. This is what I love and what I need a freaking hell of a lot more of. I just also need a new latop... and a new website. You may have noticed that I haven't written a book review on here in yonks (not sure if that is an Aussie/English word) and that is simply because I have lost all interest really. I am still doing short ones on Goodreads, but I think my bookblogging days are behind me, for now at least anyway. But I am extremely excited and enthusiastic about blogging about my life. The LifeBlog if you will. But it needs some jazz. It needs a new name and a new space. So today isn't just about me saying goodbye to my Yorkshire, but also to this blog. It will still be alive and I might come back to visit one day, but as for living here, this is the end.
When its up and running I'll let you know. I promise. Thank you. I love you.
It has been forever since my last post. And while there are many reasons, there aren't any excuses. You see I love writing and while I still journal consistently, there is something even more theraputic about reveleaing my inner thoughts to the world, even if only my Mum and best friend read them. Its about saying, I feel this way and I accept it, I can talk about it and I can embrace it. Plus, I can type much faster than I can write, which helps when my brain moves a million miles per hour. I have been thinking recently about how people talk about the trap of social of social media and how esaily people fall into comparing their life to the lives of others, who seem to have it all, when the case is that people only share when they're feeling great or something exciting is happening. I think this is improving as awareness does and social media members try to be more honest about the ups and downs they experience in their lives. Ramble ramble, long story short, that is what I am doing. My instagram is currently filled with gorgeous shots from all over the world and inpsirational quotes as I live and work abroad. However, I wanted to outline the realities of how I am finding my adventure. It is pretty great but also pretty crap. At the moment I am feeling quite low. Its overcast outside and 12pm. I am sitting on the couch in my dressing-gown for the fourth consecutive hour. I have spent all of this time trawling the internet for inspring articles, buddhist retreats and meditation classes in my local area. One of the last articles I wrote was about my morning routine and I envy it now. It currently sits at post transformational journey and I feel shitty because of that. My hair is unwashed and I ate a vegemite grilled cheese for breakfast. I feel sad. I miss Australian sunlight, warmth, customer service and being barefoot. I miss my family and friends and most of all, my dog. So I just go home? Yeah nah, I have a full time job teaching the coolest English kids. I get regualr holidays where I can travel the world with a like-minded, party-free, organised friend. I have a half British, half Aussie family that dotes upon us and a really awesome house. Plus, I still have so many countries to tick off my bucket list. I am in a stale-mate of not wanting to go home while I miss Australia and its customs like no end. What the hell do I do? My heart and my head fight a constant battle, trying to work out what it is exactly that I want.
But I know what I want! Do you? YES! Kind of. Maybe. I don't know. No.
I have whiplash.
I do know that 80% of the reason I feel this way is because I have let my self-care slip and that I'm not looking after myself spiritualy, nutritionally or physcially (exercise). I feel drained and bleh. The other 20% comes down to family stuff and sunlight. And so I do what every person who is conciously riding the waves of life does, I begin again. I hide all social media apps on my phone. I make myself meditate every day. I sign up for a 6 week running program with my colleagues (in a UK January?!). I write letters to my spiritual buddies. I write in my journal, again and again and again. I write blog posts. I read. I pray. I trust.
Classically, my best ideas always come to me when I'm totally blissed out. Today's example comes to you from under the shade of a coolembah tree, or to be technically correct an apricot tree. I am away for the weekend on my aunt and uncle's farm. I can hear my dad clunking away on the bulldozer and my Mum is heading back inside after coming out to tell me how spoiled i am, which she is 100% correct about at the moment. Need evidence, see attached photo of my position right now, sitting in a gorgeous rocking chair that my aunt brought out, along with a foot rest and her trusty sidekick Bow. The sun is starting to set and the sky is that perfect light blue with misty clouds, providing the ideal afternoon shade. The day is so warm and the breeze is sweet and cool, kissing the hairs on my arms. My escaped curls are gently tickling my nose, and life is pretty darn sweet right now. So anyway, here i am thinking about an observation I made yesterday, and like the nifty writer I am, borrowed my aunt's iPad, scored a chair and companion (hi Bow) plonked myself down to jot this stuff down.
This is my first time visiting my uncle's farm. It's gorgeous and being on the land always packs an almight punch for me. The draw is like something I cannot explain. My mind quietens and my soul softens and it is as though I have only just remembered how to breathe. That was all well and good. I soaked it all up. Meanwhile though, my cousin was getting excited about the idea of a small bonfire, and about picking up sticks. She had her work boots and boyfriend and was so happy I'm sure she was spawning fairies. You know who wasn't sharing her enthusiasm though? Me. Bonfires? Meh. I've had about a million and a half and really, and they're not so awesome. You're generally too hot or too cold. And don't get my started on the smokey stench that gets stuck in your hair, clothes and possibly soul. And stick picking? You've got to be kidding me. I spent half my adolescence on my farm picking up rocks and sticks. I wasn't likely to do it for fun. And for a little bit i felt superior, like i was a proper adult and she a little kid, excited over something silly. I felt uncomfortable with this power trip, but mostly just meh and and kept it all blasé because i was totes cool with all my farming experience. Literally less than 30 mins later i hitched a ride with her from the shed to the house. I stood on the sidesteps of the car and held the roof racks while the hair whipped around my face. Childlike glee wrapped me in a golden bubble. Afterwards I sat thinking about my two conflicting experiences and how they so clearly define people. Sure they seem to at first be split into two different people, kids and adults. But really, it's happy people and bitter people. Kids are happy because they don't care about perceptions or about appearing cool. They just care about having fun. Why does that mean that as adults we don't get to make that choice? And I'm not really talking about me choosing to not enjoy bonfires and stick picking, because I still don't. I'm talking about the choice to think that being excited about something isn't cool, normal or acceptable. Like to be happy we have to be bitter and pretentious. To look down on others because they have less experience than you with something. As soon as we do that we shift our focus away from love and into fear. How is that fear? Easy, it's fear because I am "afraid' of how I am perceived by others off appearance and other materialistic and seemingly irrelevant factors. When I began to truly understand this I could make a conscientious choice to move back into love and look at it differently. Sure, I still wasn't keen on most of the stuff, but that doesn't make me cool. It doesn't make me uncool either. It makes me nothing, nothing at all. Because it's all in my head, in your head too. Most things are as a matter of fact. And so for the rest of the afternoon when my ego reared its head, I chose love. I chose to be grateful to give my cousin her first truck experience and for the opportunity to hear my parents laughing with their friends at our bonfire while we played charades. I chose to get the most out of an experience I might not have chosen, because it was still an experience, and when I chose love a tremendously happy one. This isn't something I normally have an issue with, but my ego has reared its head at it and I'm so grateful that I have attained some clarity over the matter. It's not normally the me having fun part. Generally if I want to do something awesome I do it without fear of what other people think of me. So i think that that was the main reason for this lesson, to let go of cool. And you know what, today, my smile was extra big as I sat in the boot while my uncle drove me around, grateful for all.
So there I was in my daily meditation pose, chilled out and focused on my breath when I had the idea that I should write a post about my morning routine. Hey, hey, its like 4 hours later and here I am! I love hearing about people's daily rituals, because after all, it is the day-to-day stuff that defines and changes us, not the one offs (though they can definitely be the inspiration behind it). I think that it really gives us a good look into how people live and what they're essentially living for. I have been actively doing my morning routine for about 6 months now, and it has evolved significantly from when I first put it into place. Now this is not to say that I didn't have a routine before, because I did, and so you and everyone on this planet. Mine was generally to wake, go say hi to my parents, sit on the couch with my phone for an hour, have breaky, yadda ya. I wasn't actively choosing how I wanted to start my day, and yet, unintentionally I was. Getting on my phone straight away kind of sucked, because I was so consumed in all my notifications, updates and messages. I put so much emphasis on it straight up, and so if there wasn't much happening when I logged on, or no one had commented on my latest Booktube video I'd be bummed out. When I first started meditating and reading self-growth books, (check out my reviews here) I found that the best time for me to implement the new practices I wanted for my life, was by doing them first thing in the morning. It was a time where I hadn't encounter anyone else yet and was completely free from any outside factors which may discourage or distract me. Like I mentioned earlier, I played around with it for a while, trying to figure out what I wanted when and where. I already had a well established night routine, which pretty much still stands to date; of journalling, reading and no-phone an hour before bed (I now have an additional gratitude practice in there too). I didn't really want to change that up too much, and after experimenting for a while, decided that it was fine as is, and that I would dedicate about an hour each morning to my personal growth. And so here is what my current every-day morning looks like:
6.30am: Wake up with plenty of sunlight streaming through my open windows. It is nearing the end of day-light savings here at the moment, so the last few weeks have been a bit darker than normal, which I am still adjusting too.
6.35am: I usually take a moment to roll over onto my belly and look out my window to see the sun. I also like to think of how lucky I am to be alive this morning, with full physical and mental function.
6.40am: I used to try and get on my mat straight away, but have needed to allow for ten minutes to do all that my body needs to do. After a bathroom break and some water pulling and tongue scraping, I am ready to go.
6.50am: I lay down on my yoga mat and do some spine stretches and general warm up moves to wake myself up a little more. I then go through my pretty set yoga routine where I move from laying to standing and focus on opening my hips, stretching my spine, alignment, flexibility, core work, legs and breathing.
7.00am: I grab my phone and pick a guided meditation to do through the Calm app (which is amazing!). The last one I did was a non-judgement meditation, and before that was just on a timer and I guided myself. I get into legs up the wall pose (see the amazing benefits here) and generally meditate for 10-15 minutes. Focusing on my breath mostly, and sometimes visual imagery, affirmations and growth. I am definitely still a beginner in this regards and my practice is perfectly imperfect. Some days I'm there completely and find the time slips away, and other days I am there itching with impatience and checking my phone every few minutes to see how much longer to go.
7.15am: This next session started because I wanted to give my legs some time to get blood flow back into them. I roll out of legs up the wall pose and roll into the feotal position before a moment, before rolling onto my back on my mat. There are a few downlights in my room and I imagine the sun shooting energy through them and that this golden light then flows down into my body. The form changes each day. Sometimes it is soft and bubble-like, and other days it is a ribbon winding through my body. I like to specifically visualise the light in each element of my body and what it is doing there. For instance, I put a lot of attention towards visualising the light in my abdomen and how it is healing my endometriosis. Once I have gone through my whole body, I then thank the sun and its energy, roll and sit up.
7.20am: Affirmations time! I go and stand in front of my full length mirror and go through a series of positive affirmations. It is pretty similar everyday and I adapt my list as time goes by. I start by giving myself a hug and imagining I am hugging my inner child and inner teen. I then affirm perfect health, nutrition, work environments, finances, travel, love and spiritual growth. I finish by telling myself that "life loves me" and "all is well", before kissing my mirror.
7.30am: Now is generally when I'll turn the wifi on on my phone and check my emails and social media while I make myself some breaky. I get pretty set on my breakfast for at least six months, before I change things up. At this moment I have green smoothies, and put in a tablespoon or so of frozen berries, some fresh zucchini, broccoli stalks, baby spinach and water. I blend it all up and yummy!! It makes my belly feel instantly awesome. Some days I mix it up and have a herbal tea, eggs or bruschetta.
7.45am: By the time I finish my breakfast, and depending on what time I start work, I will normally clean up and have a shower and get dressed and ready for the day. My day is set-up and I feel pretty rad and am ready to make the most of the next 23hours before I do it all again.
And there you have it! My miracle mornings. I try my very hardest to do them each day, as I notice my mood through the day is off if I don't. In saying that though, some days, a day off is exactly what I need, especially if I can replace it with a walk or beach swim. And somedays, that is what I tell myself, and then I get half way through the day and realise my anxiety is harping up or I am getting easily flustered or frustrated with someone, and it makes me appreciate my miracle mornings and practice even more, helping me to stay dedicated to the life I want to have. I hope you've enjoyed reading this, and if you have any questions or would like to tell me about your routine, then leave a comment or shoot me an email. I love hearing from you all!
Loads of love and joy,
You know, it is always a surprise for me when I get on here and realise that it has been THAT long since I last posted, because I write these posts all the time, in my head... and in my journal.
Can we just begin with saying, how great is 2016?! I decided far before January 1 clicked over that this year was going to be a goodie. I even discussed it with friends (and strangers on the street) who agreed! I came into 2016 with four goals, all with achievable and measurable steps, which fall under the super goal of investing in myself. Because (as my cousin would say) I have no boundaries... lets take a look at what they are:
1. Live a life true to myself
2. Build a spiritual identity
3. Have my own classroom
4. Release Endometriosis
I have this ridiculously cool planner, diary, log book and more with tables, flow-charts and mind maps for how I am going to achieve them. And guess what?! They're working, because I am working! On NYE I created an up-to-date manifest board, which I look at every day, and I can proudly say that I already have or have achieved a number of these things... Need an example? Sure! I am now woking two days a week in a bookstore, which has always been a dream of mine. Instead of listening to the negativity of others, and all their "reasons" why it was unrealistic, I bit the bullet, and went for it. Now I not only work with books all day, but I made a good friend who digs Zoolander as well!
Health wise I am doing pretty rad! I am still sugar-free and loving it, and have only a week ago made the decision and effort to give up gluten. I am happy to announce that my belly feels great and I no longer resemble a mid-way pregnant lady. My latest period (no boundaries remember) was pain-free, which I believe is a result from my nutrition, exercise and spiritual changes.
Lesson wise, I have had a huge few weeks! I was so excited to see al of my manifestation work coming about and securing a range of casual work jobs in my new area. My colleagues were all funny, caring and encouraging and I was working towards my savings goal. *cue speedbump* After a fortnight of me hassling one of my employers, I (and the rest of my workmates) hadn't been paid. I loved where I was working and didn't want to leave the new friends and money I was making. However, I had a sinking feeling that my employer was involved in something heavy like drugs, and that they weren't paying us because they didn't have the money. I did some journalling, discussed it with my family and tuned into my gut-instinct before deciding that I would take them to the fair-trade obsidian and leave that workplace. This made me quite anxious, something thanks to my meditation practice I hadn't been for a while. I was jittery, on edge and couldn't even sleep in my own bed that night. I started to have torn feelings, and was uncertain as to if I had done the right thing. Thankfully a D&M with my cousin, a night in her bed, some serious page filling in my journal and tapping, I let that feeling go. Acknowledging that this was what was best for me. After I had some time to sit and reflect on it, I came to the understanding of what this lesson was about. I a) got to learn how to make coffees (hello barista babe) and build my confidence in the workplace and b) I got to stand up for myself and colleagues and take action against an employer who has been using people and the Australian government. And do you know what my affirmation for that day was? "I know that every closed door means another opportunity will arise and I believe that everything happens for a reason". Yep, the Universe is pretty awesome! Anyway, I know that I am on the right path and trust the process. I already have two interviews for a different cafe/weekend job, and have ultimate faith in myself and my ability to live a life true to myself. I am so extremely proud of myself for handling it the way I did. Once upon a time, some adversity like this could have seen me run home to my parents and abandon the idea of working 6 jobs, but I trusted that life loves me, and that all would be well. And guess what? Like loves you too!
Well beautiful beings; it has begun. It being my final education practicum, where I am so incredibly blessed to be teaching a bunch of gorgeous grade twos, with a lovely supervising teacher in a wonderful school at the beach. Oh, and did I mention that I was able to teach a yoga lesson with guided meditation earlier in the week...? Yeah, like I said, blessed!
The commencement of this prac means a number of things, and brings with it a great deal of change. Something I am learning to embrace fully. These changes include:
*Completing 16 weeks of teaching prac across four remotely different schools throughout NSW and QLD
*The beginning of my last trimester, with only two more units left of my degree
*My Department of Education Interview
*The ability to work as a paid casual and temporary teacher who is solely responsible for a large group of children
And that is just in the upcoming four weeks!!
I am also living with my Aunt, Uncle and Cousin who are honestly some of the most generous and loving people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. This past weekend I had four of my best friends congregate here where we had long walks, fish and chips and a pretty rad games night. My girls are truly sisters to my soul and having them here with me was a breath of fresh air. I had just finished my first week of prac when they arrived Friday night, and while, as I said, it is amazing, I have a rather large and itchy allergic reaction under my arm. It is such a special thing to have friends who still want to hug the heck out of you, red rash and all! It sure gave me the pick me up I needed. They went home after lunch and I have spent the afternoon watching Back to the Future II with my cousin/bestie, putting my room back to its pre-slumber-party state and writing lesson plans. It is currently five to five and I have no idea what I will do once I post this... maybe climb into bed and read a little Harry Potter, or, more likely, find a dermatologist and see if I can get an appointment sometime in the near future.
I hope your week has been as precious as mine,
It has been a genuine two months since I was last on this section of this blog, telling you about my incredible holiday up north. Two whole months! That actually astounds me, as so much, and yet so little has changed. So what have I been up to in that time? Well, here goes...
I have been growing and shrinking. Need me to elaborate?
I have had such an incredible amount of self and spiritual growth. I have had the opportunity to read a tonne of life-changing books, connect with like-minded people, reconnect with soul sisters and so much more! Self-love, compassion and respect is transforming my life. I am learning to set and enforce necessary boundaries; something I didn't even know the meaning of a few months ago. You see, I am the youngest in my immediate family of six, plus my extended (and gigantic) family. For my entire life I have felt that I was always less, because I was younger and less experienced, and less smart. I felt that I had to wait for it to be my time, that everyone was just having theirs, and soon it would be my time. But it never came. Other people's priorities, issues and desires always came above my own. For a very long time I thought that it was okay; that I was such a tough warrior who didn't need help, support or a shoulder to cry on. As you can imagine, I was in such epic denial that it took me twenty years to realise that hey, you know what, I do matter. I matter just as much as my siblings, as my friends, as the bloody queen for goodness sake! We are all the leading ladies (and gents) of our own lives, but in most cases people won't start seeing this until you do yourself. It was no fault of anyone's, because how on Earth could I expect people to treat me the way I deserved, until I truly believed and recognised my own worth. I was so busy being consumed by my loved ones issues that I was neglecting my own. Because that was the role I had taken on as the youngest. I was the fixer. I would try to control and fix every person, situation and issue in my loved ones lives because that was the only way I felt that I could be of use. And yet five months ago, after a life time of this, I became so exhausted I found to hard to breathe. And that in itself is what saved me from the dark path I was on; breath. I stumbled across a TezTalks video where I was reminded that happiness is always a choice. I just knew that I had to start choosing it for myself. And so the journey of self-love began. I learned about the power of thoughts and the conscious way we can change them to work for us. I learned how to meditate and its importance in life. I learned how to be actually be present in everything I do. I learned how to really nurture my body, mind and spirit. I learned how to look at myself in the mirror and say "you are incredible, and I love, respect and cherish you". And you know what? I am still learning, and I will continue learning until the day I leave this beautiful place called Earth. I can feel the shift that has happened within me, and I am so proud of how far I have come. I know that I will never go back because I now understand how I cannot only feel, but I know how to do it. This is not to say that struggle is a thing of the past, because in many ways I still 'struggle'. I struggle to be patient with my parents, I struggle to relinquish control, I struggle to accept that I cannot change people, only love them. But I do not like to call it struggling, I prefer the term growing. Because that is what it is, what I am constantly doing, and what I will continue to do. It is a journey of sunshine, rainbows and the occasional thunder storms, but you know what? Just like the ocean, life is always beautiful, no matter whether it is calm or rough.
Oh, and the shrinking part? Well that would be in reference to my weight. You see, nearly seven weeks ago I quit refined sugars, and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. Since I started to really nurture and cherish myself, the desire to fill my body with whole and healthy foods has increased through the roof. I have seen some amazing docos, read some eye-opening books and learned to create the most delicious and genuinely nutritious meals. I just no longer have the desire to eat rubbish. I have learned how to listen to my body and see what suits it and what doesn't. This in itself has been hugely rewarding! Who knew that my previous arch-enemy spinach has me feeling clear and clean? Or that hot chips, even the big, not greasy, but hearty delicious looking ones make me feel like , well the opposite of clean and clear. Another great strategy I have learned is to stop rewarding myself with food. I have had a bad relationship with food for a number of years and as is often seen in our culture, used it as a way to fill up the hole in my heart (and belly). Now if I feel like a treat, or deserve to be rewarded, I do it with things which serve my holistic wellbeing, such as a long soak in the tub, or watching Bridesmaids for the billionth time, or even a five minute break to play with my gorgeous puppy. I now feel a thousands times better, and just like with my spirituality growth, I know that there is no going back to unhealthy eating habits, because you cannot unlearn the severe effects of sugar on your body, and I respect myself way too much to treat it like a dump.
I hope you are all well, and doing your own growing. I'd love to hear about it, so drop me a comment or send me an email, and as always, stay beautiful. xo
My holiday in Townsville was so incredible!! You can see some photos below, as well as a video I filmed with my cousin on our way home, explaining all that had happened on our adventure of a lifetime. xo
Hi everyone; I am coming to you all the way from up in sunny Townsville, North Queensland. *YAY*
Last Thursday my cousin, my Dad and myself got up at a ripe time of 2.30am, jumped in my Dad's fifteen year old (and recently re-modeled) ute and made the treacherous 18 hour drive. All was going well; we had sore butts, had done a fair amount of shared driving, made "pull over now" pit stops and were listening to Stephen Fry read us the first Harry Potter book. However, fate was waiting to give us a not so pleasant surprise when as we were coming over a bridge just after nightfall; when a huge Brahman cow came sprinting out of nowhere and made a moment none of us will forget. I remember saying "Woo Dad, Woo" and then apparently I was shouting "cow, cow, cow!!!". Dad, being the incredible driver he is swerved slightly and braked gently. Nothing could have been done to stop us from hitting the cow without most likely tipping the ute, but Dad made the best out of a worst case scenario. Had he not done what he did, the cow may have hit us in the middle, causing it to either flip over and come through the windscreen or otherwise gone under us causing us to roll. I am very, very thankful for my Dad's ability to drive safely and he possibly saved all of our lives. As it was, we hit her doing most likely 90kms (we had just slowed down for a truck) and boy can I just say that I am so thankful for bullbars and seat belts. The bullbar minimised most of the impact which meant that no one got in anyway hurt (except of course for the poor cow who would have died instantly). We got out to check everything was okay, and although we couldn't look under the hood (as it was all pushed up) everything seemed to be working okay. The flesh damage was bad, and the whole front will need to be redone (thanks be to insurance). After checking the cow was off the road and there was nothing from the accident that would hurt anyone else we were on our way again. About thirty seconds later we heard a loud dragging noise. We got out and realised that the muffler had come unattached to the stack. Now if you ever break down, my Dad is who you want to do it with, because he is not only an engineer without papers, but he is also a fully fledged diesel mechanic *cheers again*. So he fixed it and another twenty minutes later we were on the road again! We got to Charters Towers and what to do you know, RBT. The Cop proceeds to ask Dad how he is, to which Dad replies "Ï've been better" and the Cop presumes he of course has been drinking (he hadn't, obviously - in fact he was doing Dry July) and then we went on to have a great old chat about how that piece of road is a death trap for accidents. Soon enough, we were on our way and what do you know it, maybe half an hour to go; we ran over a poor little wallaby. And then...finally we were in Towny! I was of course running on adrenalin, shaky hands and little else and proceeded to get us all very, very lost, adding an extra 20 minutes to the journey. But eventually, with my brother counseling me via the phone and Courty using her GPS; we arrived. The next day Mitch helped Dad pull the bullar back so they could access the engine. It was then that they discovered the radiator was broken (yes, the one Dad had shipped from WA and put in a week earlier) and so what was supposed to be a relaxing day to recover from driving was actually a "fix the ute" day. Luckily my brother is also a diesel mechanic and they got it all sorted and were on the road the next day on their trip to the Cape, while Court and I stayed here to look after the dog, house and have ourselves our own holiday. And that in itself has been an adventure of a lifetime too! I will write a blog post at the end of the three weeks, but if you'd like to see what we've been up to in the mean time, head on over to my instagram/twitter/tumblr feed or search #jemwalks
-You're Beautiuful, Jem :) xo
This photo was taken a bit over a fortnight ago; before I went into surgery. Last week I went back to see my specialist to get the results, and was told what we were expecting, that during my operation they found and removed three growths of Endometriosis. Never heard of it? Either had I until six months ago. And yet it is extremely common, affecting 1 in 10 women in Australia. Endometriosis is a condition which causes the lining of the uterus to grow outside of it, and in some cases on other internal organs. This leads to a variety of symptoms. For me these were fatigue, skin allergies, food sensitivities, and chronic period pain. Now I'm not talking slight discomfort or cramps once a month, but rather crippling pain and nausea that leaves me bed ridden and genuinely wishing someone would come and put me out of my misery. I suffered with this for nine years, which is actually the average time it takes to get a diagnosis for Endometriosis. Why does it take so long? One word, awareness. I just thought that what I was going through was normal, that I just had it a bit worse than everyone else, and that I shouldn't talk about it. So yeah, I'm writing this long winded post because I wish that I had have known that what I was feeling wasn't normal, that someone had have said "hey, maybe you have endo, or maybe you should get that checked out", rather than just suffering in silence. I think that no one wants to talk about it because OMG periods, gross! But I'm calling bullshit on that whole stigma. If I hadn't have been so embarrassed then I may have seeked help earlier. I now know that I'm not alone in my pain, and I have been able to connect with so many other Australian women who are trying to cope with what can be a debilitating condition. Okay, I'm getting to my point I promise. If you are suffering with any of the symptoms I just mentioned then go see your doctor. Don't be embarrassed or ashamed, and get some help. Because take it from me, it'll only get worse, not better. xo